Contact And Conenction

It was April 2009.   I was returning from Delhi by flight with a monk of the RamaKrishna Mission sitting next to me and a journalist from the US sitting on the third seat . The journalist started
interviewing  the monk as planned earlier.

Journalist - Sir , in your last lecture, you  told us about Jogajog ( contact ) &  Sanjog (connection ). It's really confusing. Can you explain ?

The Monk smiled and apparently deviating from the question   asked the journalist:Are you from New York?
Journalist - Yeh...
Monk - Who are there at home ?
The Journalist felt that the  Monk was trying to avoid answering his question since  this was a very personal and unwarranted question. Yet the  journalist  said:    "Mother has expired. Father is there. Three brothers and one sister. All married..."
The Monk, with a smile on his  face,   asked again: - "Do you talk to your father?"
The  journalist looked visibly annoyed...
The Monk  - "When did you talk to him last?"
The journalist, supressing his annoyance said:  "May be a month ago."
The Monk:  "Do you brothers and sisters meet often ? When did you meet last as a family gathering?"

At this point, I saw  sweat on the forehead ok the journalist. I wondered who was conducting the interview, the Monk or the Journalist. It seemed that the   Monk was interviewing the Journalist.

With a sigh , the Journalist said: "We met last at Christmas two  years  ago."
The Monk: " How many days did you all stay together ?"

The Journalist ( wiping the sweat on his brow) said : "Three days..."
Monk: "How much time did you  spend with your Father, sitting right  beside him ?"
I saw the journalist looking  perplexed and embarassed and scribbling something on a paper...
The Monk:  "Did you have breakfast, lunch or dinner together ? Did you ask how he was? Did you ask how his days are passing after your mother's death ?"
I saw drops of tears coming out from the eyes of the journalist.

The Monk held the hand of the journalist and said: "Don't be embrassed, upset or sad. I am sorry if I have hurt you unknowingly...
But this is basically the answer to your question about "contact and connection ( jogajog and Sanjog)".  You have 'contact'  with your father but you don't have 'connection' with him. You are not connected to him. Connection is between heart and heart... sitting together , sharing meals and caring for  each other ; touching , shaking hands, having eye contact,  spending some time together...You  brothers and sisters have 'contact'  but you have no  'connection' with each other...."

The journalist wiped his eyes and said : "Thanks for teaching me a fine and unforgettable lesson"

This is the reality today.
Whether at home or in the society everybody has lots of contacts but there is no connection. No communication...   . Everybody is in his or her own world.

Let us not maintain just "contacts" but let us remain "connected" ; caring , sharing and spending time with all our dear ones.


- Unknown

Anger Inside You

A monk decides to meditate alone, away from his monastery. He takes his boat out to the middle of the lake, moors it there, closes his eyes and begins his meditation.

After a few hours of undisturbed silence, he suddenly feels the bump of another boat colliding with his own. With his eyes still closed, he senses his anger rising, and by the time he opens his eyes, he is ready to scream at the boatman who dared disturb his meditation.

But when he opens his eyes, he sees it’s an empty boat that had probably got untethered and floated to the middle of the lake.
At that moment, the monk achieves self-realization, and understands that the anger is within him; it merely needs the bump of an external object to provoke it out of him.

From then on, whenever he comes across someone who irritates him or provokes him to anger, he reminds himself, “The other person is merely an empty boat. The anger is within me.”

Some useful timeless tips

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them'

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5.. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

We all need to live life to its fullest each day, Worry about nothing, pray about everything!!!